Saturday 2004.01.31 12:31 PM CST.
lost my grandpa and left the Gypsy for a while, not in that chronological
has exited the Gypsy.
As of Tuesday, the 27th of January, I've left the Gypsy Coffee
House for a while. It has nothing to do with the establishment
or the staff itself; as far as I'm concerned, the Gypsy is still cool
in that respect. I'll say more about my departure below, but that's
not the most important news of the week.
Well, I don't quite know how I'm going to address this on the
site, since none of you (probably) knew my grandpa, but we lost him
this week. He had been having significant health problems as of
late, and he was diagnosed with cancer within the last year. He
starrted chemotherapy and got worse and worse. Then, in late December,
he fell and fractured his hip, and he never recovered. The family
knew he was close to death within the last two to three weeks, though
I never completely lost hope that he would somehow miraculously pull
out of this. He died on the night of Wednesday, the 28th of January,
in his sleep.
don't have many "close" family members.
My parents are still living, and I go visit them every
once in a while, but all my other relatives live out-of-state.
I have a few aunts and uncles with whom I very rarely
converse, and a few cousins scattered here and there, but my strongest
familial ties have been with my parents, with this particular set of
grandparents, located near St. Louis, Missouri, running second.
This was the grandpa on my mum's side; I never really
knew my grandpa on my dad's side, since he died when I was a little
over a year old.
I haven't had many close family members, I haven't had to attend many
funerals in my life.
I can remember attending one for a distant alcoholic
uncle when I was eight or nine years old, and then one for the grandma
on my dad's side shortly thereafter.
Then, I can remember going to the funeral for "Mr.
Hayes," an old man who was one of my best friends during my awkward
teenage years and died of cancer on Christmas Eve of 1986.
This was closely followed (relatively speaking) by the
funeral for an old school friend named Penny, who died in a car crash
in November of 1988.
Those both hit me pretty hard, since they were people
I'd seen and conversed with on a semi-regular basis, and hence they
were people with whom I was really familiar, at least to a higher degree
than the preceding two aforementioned family members.
funeral, though, will be different than the family member funerals before
A year ago, my grandpa was still getting around - although
with a degree of diffifulty - and there were no real signs, until extremely
recently, that he would die so quickly.
Because of work and other issues, I had not visited my
grandparents for the last few years, though I sent them Christmas gifts
through mail order every year and occasionally talked with them on the
I can't help but feel guilty that I didn't go see him
more often, because my grandpa meant a lot to me.
Outside of my parents, he was probably the family member
to whom I would have felt the closest, if I had to choose one.
I can still remember him coming to visit us, his video
camera in hand (he loved to document things), with his normal greeting
for me, "Heyyyy Billy!" (He was one of the few people
who could call me "Billy" and walk away in one piece.)
I remember how much he loved playing games - especially Gin, which
I never completely learned, dominoes, which I learned a bit better than
Gin, and Uno, of which I could actually play a decent game...
He could never get the hang of any video games, not that he ever
really tried them, but I never really faulted him for that.
really feel badly for my mum during this time, because she's never lost
an immediate family member and I know this is extremely tough for her.
She's been pretty strong, saying things like "It would be selfish
for us to want him to go on living any longer if he was in pain,"
but she's also been really uspet about it at times, which I understand
cried more about this death than I have for any person's death for a
In fact, I've been a huge sloppy mess while sitting here
writing this update.
I'll miss my grandpa a lot.
to read something bitterly ironic?
As if the whole Grandpa situation wasn't bad enough,
while I was typing the article above, my mum called.
She'd just gotten off the phone with someone else who
delivered more bad news.
Garry, a good friend of my mum and dad who had been dealing
with leukemia for a good deal of his life, was found dead by his brother
When discovered, he was just sitting at a table.
I talked with him on the phone a couple of times, but I never met
him in person. However, this is someone else that Mum
will miss greatly, and Dad - when he finds out (mum's about to wake
him up and tell him the bad news) - will probably be devastated.
haven't even gotten out of January and two people very close to my parents
I hope this isn't a sign of how the rest of the year
now, that whole "Leaving the Gypsy" thing...
On Tuesday, 01-27, I announced during Open Mic
Night that I would not be back to the Gypsy Coffee House for "at
least a couple of weeks." That "at least" is important,
as it might be quite a bit longer. Some people are probably wondering
why I chose to leave.
I won't go into too much detail, but I have decided that it would be
best for me not to be around the Gypsy Coffee House, or people in general,
for a little while. Lately, my girlfriend and I have been having
some issues - nothing too destructive to the relationship, but a few
issues that have frustrated us both - and we have both felt hurt/deceived
by many individuals online, as well as a good-sized handful of the patrons
of the Gypsy. We're tired of being let down by people, we're tired
of people who say one thing then completely change their minds, and
we're tired of people who outright can't keep their word altogether.
The Gypsy has a lot of wonderful customers, but it also has plenty of
customers (especially female customers, not to be sexist, just to make
an observation) who seem to thrive on deceiving and hurting others.
My girlfriend and I have had enough head games for now. While
she's welcome to go to the Gypsy whenever she pleases, I personally
don't feel it's in my best interest to go there until I heal up a bit
and try to sort through some things.
that's all for now. Although I've written this today, I'm going
to purposely hold off on posting it until I get back from St. Louis
- so that not every schmoe online will know when I'm going to be out
of town. [Note:
It's being posted 02-08-2004.]
for being here and thanks for reading. I'm sure the next update
will be more uplifting. Take care, and God bless...